Laziness is bad.
Or is it?
Shall we fight laziness? Or support?
What we really have to do, is outgrow simplistic binaries. Looking at things as definitely this or that.
Not good.
And, when we add to that, a moral overtone, such as, this is bad, therefore we punish, and that is good, therefore we support, it gets even more dangerous.
Moral binaries. You know what comes from simplistic moral binaries? Ableism.
Now if you’ve never contemplated that word, shame on you, but quick, get a dictionary and sit with me.
Ableism is when you look down on someone and decide you’re better, but the attribute you’re judging them for, is something they can’t control. You see?
Okay. Let’s talk Medical Laziness.
Once upon a time, as a supercute little boy in the superlarge city of Ibadan - if you don’t know where that is, shame on you - but as I was saying, when I was little, “lazy” was a scary word.
Because I never wanted to feel the horror of being labeled lazy by powerful people, such as teachers, or mommy, or daddeee, I worked superhard.
I became the best boy in the world.
You think that’s good? Well, now that I’m old, I suffer. I suffer from overdoings. I suffer from lack of boundaries. People pleasing. Never giving myself enough rest. Always putting “humanity” above myself.
But you see, I’m not Jesus. This is sooo not a practical way to be, as a mere mortal.
If only I’d been allowed to be a child, instead of a perfect little person, I’d be healthier now.
So let’s talk about all the little people, and some of the bigger people around you, whom you may have labeled lazy?
There is lazy. What the people in my village call aláìnínkanṣe.
What we do want to be careful about is dumping labels like “couch potato!” or “unmotivated!” or “lazy”, before we understand why people are the way they are.
I am learning, that 60% of the people we label lazy, are actually suffering deeply, from a medical condition.
Actually, several medical conditions.
In these conditions, “lazy” is not something they are “doing”. It is something they are going through.
Maybe time for we listen, we don’t judge, if you know what I mean? 🤓
For example, ADHD?
If you don’t know what that means, shame on you.
Anyway 🙄. Wish we knew about ADHD when I was a little boy in school. Many of the kids at the literal back of the class could have been treated better.
But we called them names. 😕
An ADHD person knows what to do, but can’t do it.
They don’t benefit from being advised.
They don’t benefit from being criticized.
They are like single engine planes.
They need support, not more words.
Instead of heckling an ADHD person to complete that task, sit with them and work through it with them. There’s a button in their brain that controls something neuroscientists call Executive Function.
Maybe, you and I can take “doing” for granted because we are able to do. ADHD people? They can’t “do”. Their Executive Function button is missing. See?
This looking down on “lazy” people, and calling them names, that is Ableism.
Opposite of ableism? Empathy.
Other medical conditions can mimic ADHD.
For example, traumatic brain injury. When I was a medical student, a bang on the head was an unrelatable, distant theory. Now that I’ve personally managed people dear to me whose lives have been affected by a severe head bang, I have learned empathy for the ways they become “lazy”.
In medical school, we were taught the surgical sequelae of head injury. I don’t remember if the changes in their personality were emphasized? 🤔
In my current experience, personality changes are the more difficult part. What do they need? Support.
In closing, remember every time I wrote “shame on you” in this post?
That was ableism.
And, I’m sorry. 😞
No one should feel ashamed for not being a “doer”. There are people who simply can’t do. Not because they are “lazy”.
But, because their brains are wired to not execute tasks. And to power down once they start to become aware of tasks. That’s why making them more aware of urgency, doesn’t help. Rather, it cripples.
🤔
Words won’t help these “lazy” people. Support will. And support starts with empathy. Did you learn something new today? Tell us in the comments. ✍🏽
Someone who needs to feel seen might be reading.